Readin’ On A Jet Plane…

Good Evening, Bookworms!

Just a fairly short one tonight as my bags are packed and I shall have to get some sleep soon – up pretty damn early in the morning to jet off on my jollies! Turkey here I come! Just thought I’d let you all know the book situation for the forthcoming week overseas. Crime And Punishment is coming in my hand luggage with me, as is my Sony Reader, complete with 202 ebooks on it! Meanwhile, The Flea Palace and Tolstoy And The Purple Chair are in my suitcase, as is The Beach Book, which is an anthology of seaside-related short stories by various authors and the book is actually supposed to be waterproof ! May test that theory out by the pool at our hotel!

Just thought for a moment, “Should I pack The Beach Hut?”, but then I realised I have it on my Sony Reader, so it is coming with me in electronic format, if not paperback, should I wish to read it! I doubt they have beach huts in Turkey anyway, they seem to me to be a very British seaside thing! The other variant on that is the kind of beach hut you get in far-flung exotic locations like the Maldives, Bali, or places like that! I’m sure many of you know the sort of huts I mean! Thatch-roofed ones, often on some sort of pier or jetty, surrounded by white sands, crystal-clear blue seas (teeming with sea life) and basking in gorgeous sunshine…. Wish you were here? Damn right, I do! When the pigs standing on runway one are cleared for takeoff and my six numbers come up on the national lottery, that’s where you will find me, chilling out with an exotic cocktail and a good book, in a hammock between two palm trees…. bring it on!

Other reading matter is coming on hols with me, but this is just a matter of holiday guide books, one slim Thomas Cook publication about Turkey’s Aegean Coast (as that’s where Gumbet is located, next door to Bodrum in case you were wondering), and my Teach Yourself guide to Getting Started In Turkish, although I have got my notebooks with me, in which I have copied down a few basics of the language. The usual “hello, goodbye, please and thank you” sort of stuff. I always try at least a little bit of the language. The fact that you’ve even attempted a word or two is usually always appreciated, and nothing annoys me more than some of the idiots from my country who go abroad and don’t even try! I hate people like that! What do they even go abroad for?! If they just want to speak English and eat the food they have at home, why the hell don’t they stay in Britain?! Seriously!

And their menfolk in particular think they’re so hard they don’t need sun lotion! Stupid bastards! Stereotypically found on the Spanish Costas, these brainless dipshits can be spotted a mile off…. they’re red as lobsters, they usually have either England Flag or Union Flag shorts and they’re probably reading the locally-printed edition of the Sun! Page 3, I suspect… Well, when these human lobsters are being told by their GPs that they have skin cancer, they’ll be crying more tears than Gazza did at Italia ’90! I’m fairly sure, though, that you my fellow Bookworms are all far more sensible than that and that you DO take care in the sun! Talking of which, I’ve just got out my cap for my jollies – opted for my MUFC Moscow 2008 Champions of Europe cap! (Not remotely biased then, lol!) I have fair skin and blonde hair so I burn very easily. It’s not quite a case of Factor 57 and a welder’s helmet, as Billy Connolly once put it, but I usually need at least factor 40 as far as lotion is concerned, and also a hat to prevent sunstroke.

Oh well, better finish there for now as I’m up ridiculously early in the morning to go to the airport and jet off! Take care and Happy Reading!

Books mentioned in this blog entry (other than travel or language guides):

  • Crime And Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
  • Tolstoy And The Purple Chair – Nina Sankovitch
  • The Flea Palace – Elif Shafak
  • The Beach Book – Various
  • The Beach Hut – Veronica Henry
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